Meat and cheese eating beasts

Yes, this recipe uses chicken feet. Yes, it is absolutely worth it. Get over yourself and don’t be squeamish about it.

Anyone who has eaten Dim Sum knows that chicken feet are goddamn delicious. What you may not know is that they also make, hands down, the best chicken stock ever. All that  collagen around the toes creates a gelatin-heavy soup that has a succulent mouth feel and an intensely chicken-y flavor. 

Also? Chicken feet are hella cheap - Maybe two dollars for a pound, enough to create stock for a week of soups and stews. You can find them at asian or other ethnic markets.

You need:

- one pound of chicken feet

- an onion, washed, with the skin on

- two bay leaves

- 10 peppercorns

- salt to taste (but not too much as this will be a base for other things)

Wash the chicken feet and place in a pot. You can shop off the toenails, but I don’t bother.

Cover with water and bring to a boil, skimming off the foam. When the water comes to a boil, turn off the stove, and take out the feet. Dump the water and fill the pot again with cold water. Put the feet back in, along with the onion, bay and peppercorns.

Put the heat on medium, bring the water to a boil, then reduce the heat to low. The stock should barely simmer. 

Now, leave it alone. Check it every so often to skim off any foam, but if the heat is right there shouldn’t be any.

Let it simmer for about 8-10 hours. 

When it’s done, it will be a deep golden color with fat dotting the top. Turn off the stove and let it cool for about an hour. 

Strain the feet and spices out of the stock and put the stock in the fridge overnight. 

I simply keep the stock in the fridge and use it for soup over a few days, then freeze the rest in an ice cube tray and plastic baggies for other stuff (pan sauces, etc).

Good eating on these feets

Because really why stop at filling jalapenos with cheese

- 8 jalapenos, washed and cored (removed the seeds and pith)

Bearnaise sauce:
- 1 tbsp diced shallot
- 1 tbsp lemon juice (about half a lemon)
- healthy pinch of kosher salt
- 2 large egg yolks, room temperature
- 6 oz of butter, melted and hot
- 1 tbsp minced fresh tarragon

I use a hand blender for this, but you can also use a regular blender or food processor.

In a narrowish bowl (I use a Pyrex measuring cup) combine the shallot, salt, lemon, and egg yolks. Whizz it with the blender a couple times.

Keep buzzing the blender and start adding the hot melted butter a few drops at a time. Move the hand blender up and down as you do this to get additional air in the emulsion.

If you’re doing it right, by the time you blend in all the butter you should have a very thick and creamy sauce.

Blend in the tarragon at the very end, just pulse a few times to mix it in.

Take your jalapenos and stand them up in something. (We have a metal grate that works perfectly) bake unfilled at 350 for about 15 minutes, until soft.

Fill with bearnaise sauce and eat with your fingers next to the stove like the indulgent bastard you are.

If you want you want to serve them properly, you could also cap them with cheese and put back in the oven to melt. Then take them out and let cool completely. That way you can lay the poppers on their sides without all the sauce falling out.

These were super easy and super fucking delicious.
This makes enough for 2 if you are super hungry. We tend to eat less on keto so its two meals for us.

- 1.5 pounds boneless short rib
- one yellow onion, sliced large
- 2 cups stock ( I use homemade)
- one cup dry red wine
- 1 tsp red pepper flakes
- 1 bay leaf
- spice blend that’s basically emeril’s seasoning: oregano, garlic and onion powder, cumin, paprika, salt, pepper
1 tbsp butter
1/4 tsp dark soy sauce
Oil for browning the meat, I used coconut

Put the onion, stock, spices, bay and soy sauce in the bottom of the slow cooker.

Pat the short rib pieces dry and sprinkle with salt and pepper.

In a heavy skillet over medium high heat, get the oil hot and then add the meat, getting it a good sear on all sides. Work in batches if you need to.

Add the meat to the crock pot.

Turn the heat down low on the skillet and add the butter. Once the butter stops foaming, add the wine and stir, scraping up all the burned on bits of meat stuck to the pan. Add this liquid to the slow cooker.

Cover and cook on low for 8 hours.

When its done, you can add a tiny (TINY OMFG) pinch of xanthan gum to the broth in order to thicken it, or you could set aside the meat and cook the liquid in a saucepan to thicken it further.

We just ate it straight out of the crockpot with spoons like barbarians, but this would be good over cauliflower puree too.

Try them before you judge. I used to think kale crisps were a gimmiky health blogger recipe too, before I tried them. Turns out they’re addictingly crispy. Considering every attempt I have made to eat kale in a normal way has come out, well, poorly (raw kale has the texture of snakeskin and tastes like spinach’s bullying, chainsmoking older stepbrother, cooked kale has this weird sulfur thing going on), this is a great way to eat something good for you and actually enjoy it.

- one bunch lacinato kale (aka dinosaur kale)
- one teaspoon red pepper flakes
- 2 tbsp olive oil
- large pinch kosher salt

Set oven to 350.
Wash the kale leaves (look for buggies on the undersides) and tear the leaves from the stalks. Tear the leaves into golf ball sized pieces. (The stalks are tough, just toss them)

Arrange the leaves in a single layer on parchment paper on a baking sheet (if you have a silpat, use that).

Toss with the oil, salt and red pepper so the leaves are covered.

Bake for about 12 minutes. Every 4 minutes, shake the pan so that the crisps don’t burn.

Take out, let cool, enjoy. They will stay crispy for a few days in a bowl on the counter.

-1 dried bird chilli, split, seeds removed
-2 cloves garlic
-2 tbsp olive oil

-1 medium zucchini, sliced
-1 lb steak (Chateaubriand is a good cut) sliced into 1/2 inch thick pieces
Garlic powder, red pepper, kosher salt

In a large, heavy skillet over low heat, heat the oil, garlic and chilli until the smell of garlic fills the kitchen.

Use a paper towel to take off any condensation from the surface of the meat. Season the meat - there is a salt, red pepper and garlic mix from noh foods that’s great.

Turn the heat on the skillet to medium until the oil shimmers.
Working in batches so as not to crowd the pan, sear the meat on both sides and put aside on a plate with some foil to cover.

Add the zucchini and cover in the oil, adding a little more seasoning. Be sure to scrape up all the yummy beef bits that have stuck to the pan and mix them in. Cover the pan for 2 minutes to cook the zucchini through.

Add the beef back to the skillet and cook together about 5 minutes, or until the beef is cooked through and the zucchini tender.

Pick out the chilli, and serve.

- 2 lbs fresh green beans, ends clipped and washed
- 6 strips of hickory bacon
- 1/4 cup chicken stock
1 tbsp butter

Steam the green beans until crisp-tender (15 minutes in my steamer).
In a large heavy skillet on medium heat, cook the bacon until just crispy. Remove the bacon and put aside for now.
To the drippings in the pan, add the butter and chicken stock, along with salt and pepper. Be sure to scrape up all the tasty browned bits that have stuck to the pan.
Add the green beans to the pan and stir to coat with the pan sauce.
Chop the bacon and add it back in, stirring everything together. Season to taste with salt, pepper, and a few drops of apple cider vinegar.

Husband wanted dinner that was beef with cheese with more beef on top of THAT. I oblige.

- half yellow onion, diced
- 1 lb ground beef, 80/20 (that’s 20% fat)
- 2 jalapenos, seeded, diced
- 1 tbsp butter
- 1 cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese

Set oven to 350.
In a large skillet, on medium heat melt the butter together with 1 tablespoon of olive oil.
Add the onion and jalapeno. Season with salt and pepper and cook until the onions are translucent. Add the beef, chopping it into meatball sized bits. Cook til the meat is well browned on all sides.

Drain the meat mixture and move it to a casserole dish. Add a layer of meat, then a layer of cheese. Repeat until both are gone.

Bake until the cheese is melted, about 7 minutes. Revel in delicious beefy cheesyness.

Pork shoulder, bone in

Dry rub: oregano, garlic powder, onion powder, cumin, coriander, paprika, salt, pepper.

Half an onion, chopped.

5 cloves garlic, peeled and smashed.

Rub pork shoulder with salt and spices.
Heat some grape seed oil in a pan til shimmering. Sear the meat on all sides then add to slow cooker with the onion and garlic. Set the temp to low and cook 8 hours or until the bone comes out cleanly.

With two forks, pull the meat apart into strings.

Keeps in the fridge for 3 days. Reheat with a bit of liquid or fat - butter, chicken stock, sauteed onions all work well.